Hey followers!
So I am about to graduate in a week now and I thought I would write a post about my time at college, my advice for soon to be college freshman, and recognizing the people who made my time here amazing.
When I came to SIU as a new freshman in fall 2010 I was scared. Really scared. I remember my mom and brother hugging me goodbye and my mom holding in her tears as my dad and I ventured down to Carbondale. Not going to lie I cried for about 3 hours on the way down, my dad constantly reassuring me that everything will be fine. The main reason I was scared was that I knew absolutely no one who was going to SIU. I had no friends, no family, and was 6 hours away from home. It was scary. But I instantly felt better when I got there and a group of smiling faces greeted me and made me feel welcome (later I became one of those smiling faces) I then met my roommate Javanna who was very nice, friendly, and made me feel a lot better about going to college. I can honestly say she was the best roommate I had ever have and to this day I still miss our conversations and watching top model. If you are reading this Javanna you are really nice and an amazing person! :)
The other thing that made me feel great about SIU was that I made sooo many friends those first couple of nights and most of them were in my classes.
Here I should have really listened to my Grandma Head's advice with "don't become best friends with everyone Rachel, I know you will want to and I know you think everyone in the world is nice and honest but in college everybody wants to be everybody's friend and you'll get hurt if you make friends with the wrong people." I really should have listened to her. While most of the friends I made my freshman year are still great people who say hi to me, to be honest during my down time sophomore year when I had a crazy roommate who terrorized me everyday, none of those friends stood up for me, helped me, or anything. Fall 2011 was the worst semester of my college career.
But back to freshman year. Let's talk about love. Throughout most of highschool I was dating a boy by the name of Brendan. He started out being a really nice sweet guy and then turned into a jerk. I wanted to breakup with him over the summer because I felt it wasn't going to work out but he convinced me to still try....God I was stupid. He ended up breaking up with me a month after I started college. And instead of breaking up with me in person he did it over the phone the weekend after I came up to visit because he wanted me to go to the dance with him. So first piece of advice END YOUR HIGH SCHOOL RELATIONSHIP BEFORE GOING TO COLLEGE!!! I still have yet to see one work out. I have been here 4 years and had to help a lot of my residents get over broken hearts, so seriously just do it. I know you love them and want to make it work but it won't it never works. I think it's because high school love is puppy love, real and yet not real at the same time.
But then after my breakup one of my friends from highschool Peter KuraszIV helped put me back together, and we started dating, and fell in love. I love you Peter!!! Even though he lives back home and I go to SIU we still love eachother very much and the distance hasn't hurt anything in our relationship. I am crazy about my man and I hope to be with him forever because while in my other relationships I complained/saw negative things about them with Peter I don't really see anything that does, sure the flaws might be there, but I don't notice them because he's my best friend and I love him.
Okay enough about my mooshy gooshy love life. (I love you Peter!!! :) )
So sophomore year was horrible up until I got the RA job. Though it did get better when I found out my friend Jason was there and we hung out like all the time. I miss you Jason! Jason really made me feel better about the crazy roommate and we had great times hanging out together. Also I met my older brother Ben and we also hung out all the time and we still hang out all the time. But so I became a RA and I loved it/still love it. I made a lot of friends, had great floor partners (shanti, bryan, and paul) made friends with my now sister Candice!!! I love you!! And I learned a lot of valuable lessons which I will list in the advice part of this post.
Throughout college I also had a lot of great mentors. I would like to take this paragraph to thank them for all they have done for me: H.D. you have always been my favorite professor at SIU. You helped me learn a lot of things throughout college and have helped me to become a better writer. I will definitely stay in contact with you and I really appreciate all that you have done for me. Ryan you have always been an amazing boss. You helped shape me from a scared sophomore to the now leader that I am today. You are a great boss. Lauren, you are my new mentor and have helped me so much in this semester to help me find a new passion which is makeup design and I really appreciate everything you have taught me this semester you are a great instructor and a great makeup/costume designer.
And now here is my advice to incoming freshman.
1. As my grandma said "Don't become best friends with everybody" still be nice to everybody but really be selective in your friends.
2. SLEEP!!! I know a lot of freshman/sophomores do not like to sleep. Sleep is important and without it you can't function. So sleep. Also naps are amazing as any Junior or Senior will tell you.
3. Go to class! If you miss class it's like $100 down the drain. You are now paying to go to college, so go. Also most professors take attendance. And while some missed days are ok (trust me you need those mental break days) don't miss every class. Also don't miss your first day of class. So basically go to class.
4. Take care of yourself. Stay healthy. Your parents aren't here to help you to remain healthy so you have to take the initiative yourself. Go to the doctor when you are sick, eat well, again sleep, workout, etc.
5. Study. It's the best way to stay in school and get good grades. I have seen so many freshman who never study and they fail out and have to go home.
6. College is a gift, not a right. I do believe that everyone should obtain at least a bachelor's but it's definitely a gift and not a right. Just because you got in it doesn't mean you stay in. You have to go to class, behave, treat people with respect, follow the rules, and do homework. You want that degree you have to earn it first.
7. END YOUR HIGH SCHOOL RELATIONSHIP BEFORE YOU GO TO COLLEGE!! just do it. It will be hard but it will save you from a lot of heartbreak later on. Also do NOT go to the same college as your high school sweetheart. Sometimes it works sometimes it doesn't, mostly it doesn't. And then you end up regretting coming to that school. Choose a school you like and not because your gf/bf are there.
8. Don't be afraid to try new things. This was a hard one for me to conquer. But most of the risks I have taken at SIU have been great. For instance I now love thai food.
9. It's ok if you are alone. You don't always have to be surrounded by people. Sometimes your schedules won't sync with other people and sometimes you don't make friends in classes. It is ok if you are alone. And no one will think less of you if you are.
10. Listen to the advice you are given by different people. It will help you in the long run. And you don't necessarily have to follow by it but at least listen to it.
11. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO PARTY IN COLLEGE!! Sure all of the movies/tv shows/ magazines/ everything says you can't have a full experience without partying, but as a college senior I am telling you, you do not have to party in college to have fun/meet people. My freshman year I thought I had to go to parties to have fun/meet people. And I had a horrible time at them. At every party I went to there were far too many people, it was soo loud I couldn't hear my own thoughts, and at everyone I would get at least 3 drinks spilled on me. It wasn't fun. There are so many alternatives to partying, do that instead.
12. Call your parents, they love you.
13. Financial Aid is confusing, it will never not be confusing but always remember to do it on time.
14. Your professors are the most helpful people on campus (other than your RAs) they will become your mentors and help you become better at whatever field you choose.
15. Go to your professors office hours. It is a tool most students don't tap into but if you need help seriously go to them.
16. Unlike high school your classes won't have a lot of grades throughout a semester. So don't miss a test ever and do your homework.
17. If you find a good roommate KEEP THEM! sure you might not be the closest of friends but roommates are 50/50 if they are going to be good or not, so if you find one that is a good roommate keep them.
18. Have fun, but not too much fun. Go be social, make friends, etc. Just don't have TOO much fun.
19. Become an RA if you have the chance. It is a rewarding position and you learn a lot. Plus you get free room and free food.
20. Get involved on campus. There is soo much stuff for you to do, so go do it. College would be boring if you just sat in your room all the time.
21. Listen to your RAs and don't give them attitude. An RA can be a reliable resource on campus and help you with anything you need help with and be a great friend. Basically don't bite the hand that feeds you.
22. Stop living in the past and look towards the future. Stop thinking that college/high school will be the only best times of your life. Life is great.
23. Clean your room. Your mom isn't there to tell you to clean your room, and you live with a lot of people. Odors travel, messes attract bugs and mice, seriously keep it clean.
24. Keep it Classy and Cute. Present yourself in the way you want to be presented. In college you can change parts of yourself you don't like. No one generally in college sees you as your past self, but your future self.
and finally
25. College is what you make it. You are the key factor on if your time at college is good or not. You could get good grades, join a lot of clubs, become a leader, work on campus, meet true friends, and get involved, or you could just party, blow off classes, and drink a lot. Or you could do a healthy mix of both if you want. But just remember you make your own college experience and no one else makes it for you.
I had a great time at SIU and will miss it dearly. But I do look forward to the future.
Thanks for reading I know this was a long one :P
-Rachel
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